29. Zombies

A few months ago, I wrote an entry about sequels. In it, I mentioned that Hollywood has a habit of taking a good idea and then running it straight into the ground where it cannot be extracted for many years afterwards.

I present Exhibit Z.

Since about 2003, zombies have been ever present in pop culture. They’ve enjoyed a revival more popular than sparkly vampires, hunky werewolves, and Neil Patrick Harris. It’s all a symptom of America’s raging supernatural boner that has been going on ever since Harry Potter first got popular. There have been hundreds of zombie movies, zombie games, zombie fucking everything.

Like literally everything.

I have had countless discussions with countless people about what would happen in the event of a zombie apocalypse. I’ve heard just about every strategy (mine’s better though) and I’m over it. I am completely and totally over zombies. We all, as a culture, need to move on. The zombie farm is all dried up. We’ve had slow zombies, fast zombies, talking zombies, zombies throughout history, mutant zombies, magic zombies, voodoo zombies, and zombies riding sharks. It’s exhausting. Think outside the box, people.

On a related note, we can all stand to take a break from vampires and werewolves as well. It’s the 21st Century, it’s high time that we find some new monsters and things that go bump in the night. What about Wendigos? A Wendigo is a vengeful spirit from Native American folklore that travels from person to person, possesses them, and turns them into a cannibalistic madman. Doesn’t that sound neat? We could definitely do for a little more Wendigo in our culture. Maybe a Wendigo movie starring Woody Harrelson as a quiet lumberjack who he takes on a Wendigo (played by Hugo Weaving) that possesses the body of a young woman (played by Zooey Deschanel) and her adopted brother (played by Tracy Morgan). You’d watch it.

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